Impression

The heaviness of a world sinks into my chest
I peer up at the dim light,
far away at the top of this hole.
There is a list,
somwhere along the root-and-soil crumbled walls,
a list of reasons to climb out.
But it's dark
and I can't find where it starts.
I hear distant voices,
indistinct words -
life going on
life not needing me
life of those I've disappointed and failed.
They are on the list,
and many others,
but the list just feels heavy now, too.
It is so dark and soft down here.
I'll just stay a while.