Sometimes,
even when the sun is shining,
I am a rainy day woman.
I drown in my own thoughts,
thinking too hard
or too far down one rabbit hole or another.
Today I had storm clouds churning inside me,
unbidden.
I thought I had moved past this particular plot point,
this little knot of pain just beneath my sternum.
But I hadn't, as it turns out.
Something brought it back to the surface,
and I felt the depth of the
(possibly imagined) loss,
and it was fresh again.
This searing nausea.
I guess I shouldn't wallow so long in my own imagination,
if I want to avoid such things.
I should just live in the moment,
and enjoy it all.
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